Even More Gems From the Boss Man

In compiling this third list of grammatical atrocities I really had to dig deep. I searched through dozens of documents and received some excellent material that a co-worker was kind enough to send my way. After this list is posted, I think we'll be completely tapped out as far as the cream of the crap is concerned. So don't look forward to any more hilariously bad grammar for a while. I should be introducing new segments in the blog as time goes on, so we'll do what we can to keep you entertained at the expense of one very annyoing, micromanaging, manipulative, petty, deceitful, diabolical boss. So enjoy today's list and look for changes in format in the days to come. As always, names have been changed to protect the innocent.



However, the professors or TA's would need to due this themselves
(You would hope that a man who is a supervisor in an academic library would know the difference between "due" and "do")

Of concerns of early closures of last two weeks and other concerns
(This sentence just lapped itself in a race to insanity)

When you speak of co$t$ to me - you are singing to the chrior
(Don't you mean preaching to the choir?)

I have been under impression that full complements of booking components had been set up our library. Therefore I will be most anxious to hear of the parts that had not been set up.
(First of all, full compliments of booking components consist of 1) a computer with internet connectivity and 2) nothing else. This was another big misunderstanding he had that he used as an opportunity to talk down to us. Secondly, it's ok to use articles. Everybody else is doing it)

If patrons hat Morrison, Moffitt (and other) can have this option – why not other branches?
(It's supposed to be "patrons at" not "patrons hat." Not the funniest typo in the world, but I told you we're scraping the bottom of the barrel here)

I thinking the the TA got confused or perhaps wanted others to post items
(Me heap big man thinking you one who confused)

TA's thinking is that in future, instead of electronic reserve we will scan and place items for them
(I'm pretty sure the ta's name is not TA)

I had thought from gist of conversation I had gleamed last week, items professors placed on blackboard themselves would not be subject to copyrights as electronic reserves.
(I'm glad someone gleamed something from that conversation. I thought it was rather dull)

I need to know ASAP when issues like this, messages, and other from customers has been submitted by them via [the] staff for my attention.
(I'll get right on it as soon as I know what you're talking about)

There maybe times when we may wish to revise or other to the text that was sent out on the previous mailing.
(Is "other" a verb now? I must have missed that memo. Could someone please other it to me?)

Last fall electronic articles and hard copies were placed on reserve for EPD 700. The instruction was Barry Zuckerkorn.
(Ah, the old instuctor/instruction mix-up. Common mistake. Common to idiots, that is)

Today I will be flexing with processing shifting of books, requests and other. Therefore I will need to be fluid in my schedule as to when I can manage breaks and lunch and other.
(Maybe if you didn't spend all your time flexing you'd have time for breaks and lunch and other)
Duplicate journals (and other related) along with items damaged items has outlined above can proceed as they would with other collections they process
(Did I ever tell you that he gets angry if we don't follow his instructions to the letter? Sometimes we genuinely have no idea what he wants done. Read his instructions again and see if you can decipher it. That'll give you a better understanding of what it's like to work for the man)

Microfilm is unidentified from lack of labels/written description only or have same footage of the microfilm been viewed?
(How would you answer the question above? If you said, "With a scream followed by a mighty rush of wind as I flee the scene at supersonic speed" you are correct)

If physical condition of microfilm has microfilm being so fragile that it could be damaged during review – than discard.
(I've thought long and hard about this, and there isn't a thing I could say to make this sentence look more dumb than it already does)

What described above in part and parcel to processing collections.
(I could come up with about 50 different examples of how he misuses the term "part and parcel," but I think this one will suffice. I think he thinks "part and parcel" is the way intelligent people say "part")

See the Student Staff Postion Guidelines for detaled Dress Code
(Doesn't detaled mean "a person or thing that has had its story removed?")

It is evident that part and parcel to this problem is information conveyed by some staff to students that varies from the intent of the Library Supervisor.
(He included this sentence in a message to the student workers. Basically, he wants to be the only one who can tell the students what our policies and procedures are. This is problematic because 1) He doesn't really know what he's talking about half the time and 2) He doesn't ever train the student workers, so they don't ever know what to do. So this puts the rest of the staff into a position where we are constantly asked about policies and procedures by the student workers, but we aren't technically supposed to answer their questions. Nice system, eh? Also, this is yet another fine example of the "part and parcel" problem noted above)

Of lately there has been books left in many varied locations in our library
(So many mistakes in such a small sentence. How does he do it?)

John Falstaff’s absence for appointment will not effect your leave time
(I had a dental appointment and my co-worker was worried that he might not get to leave on time. Of course the boss man could've used some articles, maybe a pronoun or two, and an understanding of the difference between "affect" and "effect")

So that's all we have for today. Be sure to tune in next time when I introduce a new segment, "Lies Bosses Tell." Also, if you have any suggestions, comments, criticisms, or submissions for this li'l blog, send them along. I'll be happy to see them.